What am I thankful for?

It's Thanksgiving and it's a beautiful day. It's sunny, a little windy, it's cool outside, and the leaves are beginning to fall. But today is a day to give thanks to the amazing things and people in our lives.
I'm thankful for:
1. My parents: I am quite a handful, and my parents deal with it. I'm thankful that no matter what they've been there for me, no matter how many times I may ignore them, or yell at them. My mom is sweet and patient but she can get a temper, but she is my mother and a great one at that. She as such a great laughter, and I can't help but join along. My dad, he had leukemia when I was 4, and they told him he wouldn't live that long, but here he is 12 years later. He still gets sick and sometimes it's really bad but no matter how sick he'll wake up early to drive me to school or take me to the store. They spend so much money on my many projects, and useless crap that I always ask for. My parents are amazing, and I would never trade for the richest people on the Earth, no matter how many times I say I want them gone. Deep down, if my parents were gone I wouldn't know how to survive.
2.  My sister: My sister has always been there for me, even when she was gone for college. I would call her everyday and complain about my day, and she would just listen and try to give me advice. I've called her names once or twice, but I have a short fuse, and she's very patient so she just deals with it. I'm thankful that she moved back to town, and I get to spend everyday with her, and she's given me a ride to and from school like everyday.She's an amazing sister.
3. Judith: She is like a sister to me, and she's my best friend. We are two completely different people but we're soul-mates. She is crazy and takes risk, I'm the responsible one. She pushes me to be more adventurous and I love her for that. I'm thankful that we've been best friends for the past 15 years and all the memories we have together. Jude you're such a great person and don't you ever forget it, not for a second. Thanks for being there for me, through the tough times and the good times.
4. Ramona: She is the best rabbit you could ever ask for. I've had her for 10 years and it's been great. I'm thankful that she has lived such a long life for a rabbit, and it will be hard for me once she dies, but when the time comes I will remember the great times I had with her, she's part of my family. She is the best pet I could ever ask her, and no other animal will ever replace the love for my little furry rabbit ♥
5. Haidee and Mary Cruz: They are such amazing friends and I'm so happy that they are always there for me. Haidee, I've known her since 6th grade, and we've had the best time together. I couldn't ask for a better friendship. She's heard all my little rants, and my cursing sessions, and she's always there. Mary Cruz, I've been good friends with her since 7th grade, and it's been great. She is super smart, and always pushing me to do better in my classes no matter how man times I want to give up. I'm thankful for the both of them and hopefully our friendships continue past high school. I love you both ♥

Wondering...

You know, when I was younger i always used to wonder if I was special. If other people, the people I saw everyday and knew by name or the strangers I passed on the street and smiled at, felt and observed and questioned the world the way I did. I thought so much and had so many questions and as a tiny seven year old kid, I always wondered if I was alone. I think people interpret that as selfish, you know? someone thinking they are special, oh they must think they are all that, what a highly original concept. But the way I felt was caught in between lonely and surrounded by a crowd of people without faces. I didn't know what to think and I still don't because I have no idea of the things that cross people's minds. And I wonder about it a lot too. So I watch for subtle movements made by strangers and I skim the newspaper and I apprehend and devour any words I see in any context and attempt to understand a little bit more than I did a moment ago. I want so badly to understand because I don't know for what other reason we could have been put here, all of us together, here. This whole thing, existence and being and all, it has got to be about interacting with people and wondering if we are, everyone is. And I don't want to hear that everyone is special, no one is crap because if you think about it, the probability of the universe erupting and producing a galaxy and amidst that galaxy would be a solar system with lots of planets and of those planets would house a species of beings so distraught and complex and flawed that we would end up destroying each other and our planet and all the while, creating and producing and falling in love and feeling, even if just for a split second, on top of the world; that within and individual being would be the proper balance of chemicals and substances and bone marrow and muscles and skin and vital organs that can't be described as anything but intrinsic is so precise and incredible that if you ask me, all of that is pretty damn special. And to go a step further, more than just the DNA we share with one another, we are all genetically so different beyond a basic human formula, we are all unique in this universe. So I don't care about the technicalities or logic of this specifically, I just want to understand everything I can while I am here.

♥ Cat B.